How does jealousy impact romantic relationships? It goes against the disciplines of love – universal principles for building a trusting, healthy union.
The discipline of unconditional love and compassion becomes impossible to sustain, since jealousy impairs your ability to love without barriers.
It’s also impossible to be truly vulnerable when jealousy is an issue, since jealousy creates tension in the relationship. Envy clouds discernment, and it becomes hard to tell the truth from mere suspicions.
You can’t give your partner the freedom to live life when you’re jealous, nor can you truly feel free to live your own life when you’re dealing with a jealous partner.
Jealousy can creep into all areas of your life, making it hard to enjoy anything. When jealousy is given full sway in a relationship, neither party thrives.
Your partnership will suffer if you let jealousy go unchecked. Understanding how to stop being a jealous girlfriend or boyfriend requires being honest with yourself and your partner.
Here are 5 ways to stop being jealous in a relationship:
1. Consider the source of your insecurity
Mastering how to stop being jealous in a relationship is often a matter of healing the wounds of the past. If you’re struggling with jealousy due to an unresolved issue like a childhood trauma or addiction, get the support you need to overcome it. With the right help, you can transform your struggles into sources of strength.
2. Be honest with your partner
If you’re struggling with jealousy, your partner has probably already noticed. Your partner is most likely also contributing to the problem. By practicing effective communication, you’re acknowledging your contribution while also holding your partner accountable – and giving them the opportunity to support you as you work toward a solution.
3. List your insecurities
Mastering how to stop being a jealous boyfriend or girlfriend starts with looking at yourself. What insecurities are driving your jealousy? Are you unsure of yourself due to perfectionism? Are you comparing yourself to others? You’re not making this list to shame yourself – you’re owning your role in the relationship.
4. Cultivate self-confidence
Once you’ve made a list of the insecurities driving your jealousy, write down an antidote to each one. If you’re living under the shadow of your partner’s ex, make a list of all the traits your partner loves about you. If you constantly compare yourself to celebrities, unfollow them on Instagram for a week. By giving yourself space from feelings of inferiority, you’ll be able to develop the self-confidence you need to overcome jealousy.
5. Be honest about jealousy’s impact
It’s impossible to solve a problem if you refuse to acknowledge it. Rather than pretending you aren’t jealous or your jealousy isn’t a problem, be honest. How do you feel because of your insecurities, and how are they hurting your relationship? It might be difficult to acknowledge the problems your envy is causing, but take heart in the fact that you’re taking the first step to a healthier relationship.
